Women - Wake Up !

Don't be a woman who needs a man, Be a woman whom man needs.

Recently I  came across a blog, ‘http://iamwoman-mxtodis123.blogspot.com/’ which helped me to find few answers which I had been seeking from a long time.. Its not that, I didn’t get answers , I got but they were not able to convince me . But the blog is the answer to my several questions.

From one of her posts ,” Leaving an abusive husband: My story” -

‘I discovered that, when you build up your own confidence, and exude a sense of pride in yourself, you open yourself up to a different type of man.  Love, real love, had finally entered my life.’

 (Though this was a case of an abusive husband. Mine was different & there could be other reasons which makes a woman lose her self worth). Her these words have done something to my conscious, subconscious & unconscious mind. They just keep on echoing in my ears. This is seriously a time to act & restore my lost self esteem,to love myself, to respect myself. to make myself more aware relations in general rather than sinking in the past & asking the same questions over &  over again,” why didn’t I get my dream man?, why am I not able to keep myself happy?, what is the thing that I feel constantly missing?, why am I not able to love myself & capable of believing that I am adorable?” Etc etc …..The answers lie somewhere in finding my own self worth & self esteem that’s what I felt while reading her blog….

From her another post ‘Characteristics of victims’

• We are desperate for love and approval and will do anything to make people like us. Not wanting to hurt others, we remain "loyal" in situations and relationships even when evidence indicates our loyalty is undeserved. (I would say not wanting to lose them, having an extremely hard time "letting go.")

• We are intimidated by angry people and personal criticism. This causes us to feel inadequate and insecure. (I would say it further adds to our feelings of inadequacy and insecurity.)

• We continue to attract emotionally unavailable people with addictive personalities.

• We live life as victims, blaming others for our circumstances, and are attracted to other victims (and people with power) as friends and lovers. We confuse love with pity and tend to "love" people we can pity and rescue. (And we confuse love with need)

We are dependent personalities who are so terrified of rejection or abandonment that we tend to stay in situations or relationships that are harmful to us. Our fears and dependency stop us form ending unfulfilling relationships and prevent us from entering into fulfilling ones. (I would add because we feel so unlovable it is difficult or impossible to believe anyone can really love us, and won't eventually leave us once they see how "bad" we are.)

I am trying to figure out how to contribute to this woman’s efforts to create awareness about women sufferings. Long way to go, but have to begin from somewhere. I hope this blog will be of great help for all women sufferer & will be able to make themselves realize of their worth…. I request everyone to contribute to her effort….

A poem composed by me for all the woman out there who are suffering & lacking self esteem…….

They say, You're beautiful. 

You're beautiful, it's true.

But the belief has to come,

From within you !

No matter what the

World say to you

Hold this belief

Tight within you !

You are an angel

With a pretty smile

Fill yourself with self esteem

& walk an extra mile!

------written &  shared by lilywhite.